To Me, My X-Men Comics! - Uncanny X-Men Issue 117
In which Charles spins a yarn, and seamen come to the rescue
PREVIOUSLY IN THE UNCANNY X-MEN: Advice-offering sabre tooths! Thermal exhaust ports! Excessive urban planning!
Last issue, the X-Men thrillingly escaped that terrible Ka-Zar, Lord of the Savage Land comic that threatened to ensnare them. They therefore open this issue on a raft in the dangerous seas of the Drake Passage, a ‘narrow strip of water separating South America from Antarctica’ that purportedly has ‘the worst weather in the world’, which feels harsh on Manchester. Luckily, the ill-equipped seafaring X-Men are rescued by a passing mystery Japanese freighter, the mission of which is left suspiciously unspoken (but almost certainly, given the era, has something to do with whaling, Sony Walkmen or Pat Morita).
Meanwhile, back at the X-Mansion, Jean, still believing everybody else is dead and feeling awkwardly third-wheelish in Charles and Lilandra’s sexually charged company, decides to move out. A relieved Lilandra takes the opportunity to make the Professor a seductive cup of coffee, only to be furiously disappointed when Charles instead decides he’d much rather spend the entire issue flashing back to the story of the time he met a fellow telepath in Cairo, picked a psychic battle with him, then blasted his mind to blithering shreds.
It’s not much of a story and, hence, not much of a comic book. But on the plus side, it’s also not Ka-Zar, Lord of the Savage Land. Also, on the other plus side, it’s enough to convince Lilandra it’s time she left Earth and returned to the space empire she abandoned several issues ago. “Yes,” agrees Charles. “And while it will torture me to leave Earth, I will come with you… wherever that may lead me.” “Oh,” says Lilandra, swallowing hard. “Yes. Uh, I suppose that will be fine.”
MVP: I dunno. Maybe Storm? She at least makes a bold attempt to interrupt Charles’ interminable and pointless backstory with the time she pickpocketed him as a child, before being cruelly swept aside in his retelling.
Next issue: A lot of late twentieth-century Japanese stereotypes, I’m guessing. But with a nautical flavour.