The Amazing Story of Superman-Red and Superman-Blue - Part 3
The greatest Superman story of all time!
Previously, in Part II: The two Supermen got rid of Atlanteans, built an anti-evil ray and tried not to be jealous of Lex Luthor curing all known diseases
Part III - The End of Superman’s Career
With all crime on Earth eliminated by the twin Supermen’s incredibly powerful brainwashing rays that orbit the Earth, controlling the minds of everybody who dare deviates one iota from the societal norm, the duo’s crimefighting career screeches to an abrupt halt. Especially since this is the 1960s, famously not a time for introspection about the morality of such matters. Instead, the duo decide to marry Lois Lane and Lana Lang, sensibly choosing to have just one wife apiece. Despite Jimmy bloody Olsen gatecrashing the wedding by marrying Lois’s sister, Lucy Lane, alongside them, the two Supermen live out the rest of their days in non-comic book-worthy domestic bliss, Superman-Red, powerless like an idiot on New Krypton, while Superman-Blue sticks around on Earth because he’s heard The Beatles will be along any moment.
Fun With Comics!
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It’s Comet the Super-Horse! Why isn’t Comet affected by Krypton’s red sun? Uh, because he’s a former centaur, enchanted by a witch to not only have a variety of superpowers, but also able to switch between human and horse form (a kind of were-centaur, I guess), but only while a comet passes through the solar system, obviously. And, yes, this isn’t spelled out in the panel - we kids were just expected to know this shit. And we did. And we loved it.
Top Panel
Unable to decide who gets first choice between Lois and Lana (do the ladies get a choice which Superman they prefer? Ha ha ha! Of course not), our twin heroes solve the problem in the same way you or I would. Namely, by constructing a pair of Ls (for Lana Lang and Lois Lane) and allowing a bolt of lightning to determine who picks first. Tossing a coin is for suckers.
There we have it. The greatest Superman story of all time. Will the James Gunn movie stick to this plot? Fingers crossed.
