England v India One-Off Women’s Test, Day Two

Featuring gaudiness and Morpheus off the long run

Gaudiness
Grade: A-

Gaudiness is often portrayed as a negative thing - I mean, consider the definition: the state of being gaudy. Ugh. No, thank you.

That wasn’t the case on the second day of this Test, however, as Kranti Gaud sprung into immediate showy action, tastelessly having Maya Bouchier caught behind to go with her ostentatious trapping of Tammy Beaumont the evening before. Not satisfied with that, she then garishly knocked out Alice Capsey’s off stump, on her way to an eventual tawdry five wicket haul. OMG.

In between those needlessly flashy wickets was Sayali Satghare removing Heather Knight. Predictably, Knight made a defensive move, back and across before being pinned. A classic gambit that ultimately led to the former England captain resigning the game.

A less easily thesaurus-inspired or chess-mapped partnership between Nat Sciver-Brunt and Amy Jones then briefly threatened an England recovery.

But only briefly.

Morpheus Off The Long Run

I went to bed at lunch with England 5/137, trailing by 148. I woke up to them all out 170, trailing by 269, with India still having nine wickets in hand.

Confirmed! A new women’s Test record crowd
Loads of India fans there, understandably loud
Whereas England’s applause
Is more strained, because
All their hopes rest on an unexpected rain cloud